Fear of speaking up.

Are you afraid to speak up when you have something to say.  Do you push your feelings down so you don’t make waves and make it about the other person so they don’t get mad?  This is a huge issue that most of us have, especially woman.  It has taken me a long time (and I’m still learning) to speak up and make it about me.  I was always afraid to acknowledge my feelings and express myself in fear that I would be judged in my need.  Little did I know that I was judging my own needs and keeping myself attached to the fear by doing that.   I learned this behavior from my parents as I was constantly judged and scrutinized in their fear so I wouldn’t leave them. For example does the person that you are confronting scare you? Is he or she reminiscent of your parent?  If so then go back to your childhood fear and try to understand how the current situation you are in was similar to your past situation and how it made you feel. When you had a childhood need and you expressed it to your parents, what happened, were you acknowledged or were you made to feel like a burden and humiliated. Once you connect to the childhood experience of your fear of speaking up, you will feel stronger and have an understanding of why you were afraid to speak up in the first place.  It’s a practice and won’t happen overnight but once you become conscious of your pattern, it will become easier.